Welcome to the Shepherd's Connection. This site, and the ministry it supports, is dedicated to those who have committed themselves to serving in Christian ministry. The web site is a place for ministers to connect and share growth opportunities, encouragement, and find/share support with other ministers. The backbone of the ministry is not a “person” but the ministers.
The Bible says:
“As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.”
(Proverbs 27:17)
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Saturday, 19 May 2012 20:00
Senior Pastor: What Your Staff Needs From You
Written by Written anonymously by a Christian CounselorI am a Christian Counselor and there have been times when I have been asked just what a Christian Counselor is, or what Christian counseling is. H. Norman Wright defined Christian Counseling the most succinctly when he said, “Christian Counseling is being like Christ.” What this necessitates is that when we provides “Christian Counseling,” we function sometimes as a priest - representing God to individuals, or as a prophet, communicating what God has said, or as a friend - one who comes along side, or as an encourager - one who builds up and strengthens another. In other words, we act as Christ in meeting the needs of those we are called upon to minister to, and of those we are called upon to minister with.
In 1 Corinthians 11:1, the Apostle Paul wrote, “Be imitators of me, just as I also am of Christ.” It is so easy when functioning as a senior pastor to lose sight of the fact that we have been called to minister not only to our congregation but also to those with whom we minister with – our staff. The goal as senior ministers is first and foremost to be like Jesus Christ. As a result, we are not just someone’s boss; we are first and foremost to be like Jesus Christ.
Over my years in ministry, I have been privileged to serve as a missionary, a church planter, a senior pastor, a seminary professor and as a counselor. On one occasion, I was asked to work on a church staff. During my tenure there, I served on a staff of 20 plus ministers. Over a quarter of those ministers came to me seeking counsel about how to deal with the senior pastor. Each one of them was looking for a way to find another church position. I believe the senior pastor loved the Lord, but those who came to me for counsel did not see that because they did not see his love for them.
As a senior pastor, we are called first and foremost to be like Jesus.
If you or I were invited to sit down and have a chat with the original disciples and we could ask them what Jesus was really like, I think every single one of them without exception would say the exact same thing. They would respond saying, “Oh how He loved me.” For sure, there were times He instructed and corrected. There were times He came alongside and helped. There were times He simply came and spent time with them being a friend. But you may react and say, “I’m not supposed to be their friend. I’m the senior pastor. I’m the boss!” But the Scriptures see it otherwise and clearly say we are to be like Christ.
The night before our Lord climbed the cross to show His ultimate sign of love for you and me, He said in John 13:35, “By this, all men will know you are my disciples if you have love for one another.” How do we show love to our staff? If you will, consider the following ways.
To really show love to someone, you need to spend time with them. Take them to lunch, invite them into your home, get to know them by asking about their family, their faith, their struggles, their interests and their joys.
Ask them how you can be praying for them. Let them know that this will be in confidence. One thing they do not need to suspect is that their prayer request will be your next sermon illustration.
Ask yourself how you can serve this staff member and the others who are on your staff. Be specific. Our Lord washed His disciples’ feet (John 13:5). In Christ’s kingdom, unlike the corporations of the world, to truly lead is to serve (Luke 22:24-27).
What your staff needs from you is what the world needs to see in the church, individuals who are imitating and following Christ the Master. It starts at the top. As the senior pastor, you will either lead by example or by excuse. By God’s grace, strive to be like Christ.
On August 3, 1992 at the Barcelona Olympics, Derek Redmond of Great Britain made history. His piece of history was not for winning the 400 meter race or a gold medal. His piece of history was because of the way he finished. Derek was considered a favorite contender to win a gold medal. About half way through the race he heard a pop. It was his right hamstring. Redmond soon found himself trapped by the searing pain in his leg.
The other runners finished the race as Redmond desperately continued his painful effort, determined to cross the finish line. He waved off would be helpers, determined to finish on his own. One persistent helper would not be waved off, Derek’s father. As Derek’s father arrived at his son’s side he assured him, “You don’t have to do this.”
Derek said: “Yes I do.” To this Derek’s father said: “Well, if you are going to finish the race, we are going to finish together.” Father and son crossed the finish line arm in arm to the sounds of a cheering stadium.
As you serve in ministry, there is an innate desire to finish well. This past week God showed me an encouraging truth, as I read His word. In Deut. 31 we find Moses’ final actions, as the leader of the Israelite people. In the first few verses of that chapter we find some guidelines about finishing well. This could apply to the minister who is facing retirement, is considering a move, a struggling pastor who is considering resigning, a minister who is discouraged or a person needing pumping up in the midst of a great ministry. All of us need to be reminded to finish well.
1So Moses continued to speak these words to all Israel. 2And he said to them, “I am 120 years old today. I am no longer able to go out and come in. The Lord has said to me, ‘You shall not go over this Jordan.’ 3The Lord your God himself will go over before you… He will destroy these nations before you, so that you shall dispossess them, and Joshua will go over at your head, as the Lord has spoken.”
Consider these lessons from Moses.
- · Moses was faithful. In verse 1 we are told he “continued to speak.” He shared God’s truth as long as he was able.
- · Moses knew his limitations. In verse 2 we find these words, “I am no longer able to go out and come in.” It is a difficult thing to admit you have lost your effectiveness or you are past your prime. As ministers, there are times when we lose our effectiveness in a given place of service.
- · Moses continued to point people toward God. He knew it was not about him. He knew his time was drawing to an end. Moses said, “The Lord your God…will go before you.” Serving in ministry is not about us. It is about the God we serve.
- · Moses poured himself into those who would follow him. The list included the Israelite people but also Joshua, his successor.
My prayer is that you and I will run well. Even further, I pray that we will finish well.
Do things ever go wrong in your life? I spoke with a friend today who aired some frustration. He had planned to use a video in his Sunday morning sermon. However, everything went wrong, the video presentation was a failure and he felt like his sermon fell flat. Life sometimes works out that way. The following poem has always been an encouragement to me.
When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up though the pace seems slow--
You may succeed with another blow.
Often the goal is nearer than,
It seems to a faint and faltering man,
Often the struggler has given up,
When he might have captured the victor's cup,
And he learned too late when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.
Success is failure turned inside out--
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far,
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit--
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.
- Author unknown
In Philippians we find a Biblical example that supports this topic. Paul faced chains - 1:12; envious workers - 1:14; false teachers - 3:2; church division - 4:1 and other problems at Philippi. In spite of these difficulties Paul had a positive perspective. He said “I want you to know brethren that the things which happened to me have actually turned out for the furtherance of the gospel.” (1:13) Wow, God help me to see your perspective when things go wrong!
Have you thought about the hare and tortoise story lately? This fable has been analyzed, studied, interpreted and retold many times. The story has been the basis of musicals and plays. The danger is that familiarity causes us to miss some enduring lessons.
The other day I thought about my own hare and tortoise experience. I know a counselor who used a hare and tortoise presentation on his computer to assist clients with relaxation techniques. It worked like this. A client was fitted with a listening device that played soothing sounds while he held a set of sensitive electrodes in each hand. While listening to the sounds and holding the electrodes the client watched a race between a hare and tortoise on the computer screen. The client’s relaxation response regulated the speed of the tortoise. The goal was to propel the tortoise to victory. The electrodes sensed tenseness or lack thereof. The object of the exercise was to relax and propel the tortoise to victory.
Naturally, yours truly had to try his hand at this challenge. Only problem, if you approached the exercise as a game, you were defeated from the start. I have always been competitive. Well, how do you relax when you are trying to win a victory? This is the problem! Life is complicated by the stresses, time pressures, deadlines, competitions and perceptions that make the simple complex. The computer exercise appeared easy, to the casual observer, but it was not!
Those of us who serve in ministry face this challenge every day. How do we relax and enjoy the journey? How do we let go of the competitive drive? How do we propel the tortoise to victory? From my experience I am reminded of four vital truths that affect my service to Christ.
- · Honesty is imperative! Initially I was not able to help the tortoise. I had to recognize the tenseness in my body. A person would not go to my friend unless he realized he needed help. Ministry friend, do you recognize your vital signs? (Are you driven, irritable, tense, suffering from a loss of creativity, etc.?)
- · Relaxation is a learned response! My friend purchased the software to help people “learn.” Are we living the message of “peace” that we preach or do we need to learn the practical aspect of our own message?
- · Growth is a decision! Trusting God, emotional-spiritual growth and facing short-comings are decisions. The decision is embraced or denial is embraced. It is easy to challenge everyone else to grow—but—are you growing?
- · It is critical to recognize stressors. Stressors could be far reaching: jealousy, control issues, fear, pride or ambition. These issues cause tension, take away joy and slow the tortoise.
As I conclude these thoughts there are two issues racing in my mind. One, I want to enjoy the journey. Why should I preach about “peace” and not experience “peace?” Two, I do not want to be an empty vessel. Paul said, “Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal.” (I Cor. 13:1) In other words, if I preach a message, but do not live the message I am an empty vessel. I pray that you and I will be authentic in both and words and the fruit of our lives.
Printed with permission of a foreign missionary whose name and location cannot be disclosed.
Even though I am a tried-and-true EXTREMELY scheduled, organized, live by a routine, ordered girl, there are times when I am just itching for some spontaneity. I vacillate from wanting to have everything written out on a minute-by-minute schedule for the entire week (including play dates, meal plans, and projects to get done) to wanting something new in my days to spice things up. My personality is such that although I am a creature of habit and do not love change, I also get bored very easily with the mundane and routine things in life, and I often grow weary in wanting a change, a challenge, something new and interesting to do.
This is often difficult due to where we live and the stage of life we are in. Diapers must be changed all throughout the day, meals must be prepped and cooked, clothes must be washed, tot school must be taught, etc. Monday through Sunday all of these things take place; and then it starts all over again.
So today, after having had such a fun time with my dad, having all kinds of new experiences and exciting adventures, I looked forward at my “plain” old week of routine and felt discontentment growing. I know that I should have "punched that beast in the nose" (this is a phrase my son and I often say when we don't like something) and force myself to muster up words of thanksgiving knowing that thanksgiving precedes joy, but instead I grumbled... and not just a little. I had a full out pity party and wanted everyone around to join in.
Not knowing exactly what to say, my husband took the kids for a walk and gave me some time to think. First came grieving...again...grieving the loss of what I feel I want or deserve. Then came the giving up... giving up my will, my way, my rights. Finally came the words of thanksgiving and of prayer... asking God to satisfy my soul and give me overwhelming contentment in Him. This is a journey I have been on for years, and I am so thankful that even when I lose my way and get off the path a bit, the Lord is always so sweet to bring me back and set me straight again.
